The Fugitive: House of Representatives Version

Sandra Wade
4 min readJan 13, 2023
Maybe he’s just trying out his volleyball moves?

What is the deal with this weirdo George Santos, anyway? Is there anything he hasn’t lied about? Why is he here? Is he a spy? Where did he get all that money? Can we really trust him to look at classified documents?

As some of my followers may know, I’m a screenwriter. As I was watching yet another news clip about this weirdo serial liar, I started thinking this morning about that old Harrison Ford movie where he’s accused of a crime he didn’t commit and ends up on the run.

I came up with an explanation for George Santos that would also make a pretty cool movie:

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The setting is Brazil. A serial liar and lifelong grifter is on the run from the law for ripping off sick and dying elderly people his mother took care of. He also has a slew of former lovers, roommates, and friends he’s ripped off and trying desperately to avoid.

He needs to get out of the country, and fast. Gotta go far far away. Somewhere he’s untouchable. A place with no rule of law, where even the worst sorts of criminals like traitors and insurrectionists are never held accountable. Suddenly, it hits him.

There is a place where kookoo for cocopuff nuts, wackos, morons, grifters, and coup plotters are not just free from accountability but actually allowed to reap unlimited fortune and fame.

So he assumes s a fake name. (Probably) fake passport. Fake resume. Concocts a background out of whole cloth. Runs for the U.S. House of Representatives as a gay Jewish Republican who lost family in the Holocaust, friends in the Pulse shooting, and his mom on 9/11.

He funds his campaign with millions in shady Russian money because being a grifter, he will sell out to anyone in his own self interest.

Lo and behold, the surprising plot twist is that he actually wins a seat in the US House of Representatives for the state of New York. And he was able to do it under the radar. Because local news outlets in the U.S. are so cash-strapped and resource-thin now, only one media outlet exposed his lies, and…

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Sandra Wade

Actor, filmmaker, writer and sexy cat lady.. Currently showing at a festival near you: http://www.mailorderbridefilm.com/